I almost went for the story about a man with a revoked license (DUI offenses) who drove his riding lawnmower through traffic to a convenience store and back on a beer run, erratically careening through lanes as he did so dead stinkin' drunk and dropping some cans of Millier Light along the way. Humorous and tragic at the same time.
Instead, I've opted to run with a story opposite that, one that is tragic and humorous...
DATELINE: BOYNTON BEACH, FLORIDA
An unexpected death of a loved one is intensely jarring. When it's a senseless murder, it's even more so. What was to be a day at the gym and then the beauty parlor suddenly turned dark for Dalia Dippolito, an attractive and youngish-looking 30-something Boynton Beach resident.
While at the gym she got the phone call no one ever wants to receive. The police informed her that there had been a crime committed at her home and that she needed to get to there forthwith. Upon arriving, she saw a flurry of law enforcement activity around the property with yellow crime scene tape strung like garland on a Christmas tree, and CSI techies dusting the porch for fingerprints.
A police video camera happened to be running as the officer in charge had to break the news that her husband was found murdered, with Dalia turning hysteric and breaking down. The officers then escorted her to a waiting cruiser to go to headquarters where they could talk more in private and debrief her away from the crime scene that surely was overwhelming. To add a cherry on top of this 'split' story, she was put face to face with the suspect charged with shooting her husband twice in the head.
"The Academy Award for 'Best Actress' goes to....."
This get's really 'fried', so hold on....
The 'suspect' she met was an undercover cop. Her husband was alive and perfectly well in the next room. The flowing curtains of 'dramatic irony' come full circle through the stages of a) preparation, b) suspension, and c) resolution through the following unveiling...
It was a set-up. Actually, one of several set-ups. Let's go to page 1 while we lose that deer in the headlight look, shall we.
Last Friday night a 'confidential informant' contacted police about a woman who asked them to help her hire a hit-man to rub out her husband of all of 6 months. Saturday afternoon she met the unidentified informant at a local gas station to make the arrangements, which included forking over $1,200 for a deposit and funds to go buy a handgun.
She provided the informant with a bunch of photographs of her husband and their townhome to make ID fool-proof. She wanted a daytime 'whack job' and offered to have a hair appointment set up at that time over in Boca Raton so she would have an alibi. She further discussed that she would deny any involvement by providing false names and information to keep investigators away from her. (Note to self: bad idea)
The police report details that Dippolito wanted to make sure the deal was 'solid' and that there would be no excuses for a failed or delayed 'appointment'. The deal was struck, and two days later, this past Monday, Dalia went to a CVS parking lot to meet up with the hired hit-man. Upon the successful snuff, he would be paid $3,000 and make her 'very, very happy' according to documents. Oh, lest I forget, the hit-man was an undercover cop.
As all was being finalized, her parting words were, "I'm not going to change my mind. I am 5,000% sure I want it done. When I set my mind to something, I get it done."
I'm not sure what 5,000% really is, but it's going to get her some solid jail time and a cup of coffee.
Instead, I've opted to run with a story opposite that, one that is tragic and humorous...
DATELINE: BOYNTON BEACH, FLORIDA
An unexpected death of a loved one is intensely jarring. When it's a senseless murder, it's even more so. What was to be a day at the gym and then the beauty parlor suddenly turned dark for Dalia Dippolito, an attractive and youngish-looking 30-something Boynton Beach resident.
While at the gym she got the phone call no one ever wants to receive. The police informed her that there had been a crime committed at her home and that she needed to get to there forthwith. Upon arriving, she saw a flurry of law enforcement activity around the property with yellow crime scene tape strung like garland on a Christmas tree, and CSI techies dusting the porch for fingerprints.
A police video camera happened to be running as the officer in charge had to break the news that her husband was found murdered, with Dalia turning hysteric and breaking down. The officers then escorted her to a waiting cruiser to go to headquarters where they could talk more in private and debrief her away from the crime scene that surely was overwhelming. To add a cherry on top of this 'split' story, she was put face to face with the suspect charged with shooting her husband twice in the head.
"The Academy Award for 'Best Actress' goes to....."
This get's really 'fried', so hold on....
The 'suspect' she met was an undercover cop. Her husband was alive and perfectly well in the next room. The flowing curtains of 'dramatic irony' come full circle through the stages of a) preparation, b) suspension, and c) resolution through the following unveiling...
It was a set-up. Actually, one of several set-ups. Let's go to page 1 while we lose that deer in the headlight look, shall we.
Last Friday night a 'confidential informant' contacted police about a woman who asked them to help her hire a hit-man to rub out her husband of all of 6 months. Saturday afternoon she met the unidentified informant at a local gas station to make the arrangements, which included forking over $1,200 for a deposit and funds to go buy a handgun.
She provided the informant with a bunch of photographs of her husband and their townhome to make ID fool-proof. She wanted a daytime 'whack job' and offered to have a hair appointment set up at that time over in Boca Raton so she would have an alibi. She further discussed that she would deny any involvement by providing false names and information to keep investigators away from her. (Note to self: bad idea)
The police report details that Dippolito wanted to make sure the deal was 'solid' and that there would be no excuses for a failed or delayed 'appointment'. The deal was struck, and two days later, this past Monday, Dalia went to a CVS parking lot to meet up with the hired hit-man. Upon the successful snuff, he would be paid $3,000 and make her 'very, very happy' according to documents. Oh, lest I forget, the hit-man was an undercover cop.
As all was being finalized, her parting words were, "I'm not going to change my mind. I am 5,000% sure I want it done. When I set my mind to something, I get it done."
I'm not sure what 5,000% really is, but it's going to get her some solid jail time and a cup of coffee.
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