"Fried Fridays: Smile or ELSE!"

Whereas in past weeks I had a cornucopia of stories to write about for "Fried Fridays", this week I'm holding an empty poke. Stupid stories, sad stories, but little in the really 'fried' category...and I'm running with a story composed of only 135 words.

The story was that a judge threw out this case...as well he should have...but the 'fried' component was the original lawsuit...

DATELINE: ERIE, PENNSYLVANIA

Judge Ernest DeSantis, Jr. threw out a case before him this past Wednesday, on the grounds the plaintiff failed to make a case. Bravo. To say we have become a litigious society is a gross understatement...we sue for any and everything, and the worst part is not the taxpayer money wasted in the process but the asinine amounts of money awarded to idiots for idiotic reasons.

I bet you'd like to know how I really feel...

Luckily, this bull was stopped in its tracks before an awards ceremony. We start with a 12 year-old girl named Dominica Juliano, the 'traumatized' youth in this story. The suit was filed by her unnamed guardian, so it wasn't a mom or a dad. It may have been the grandmother who was with young Dominica when that fateful day occurred.

NOTE: The following account may not be acceptable for young readers. Proceed with caution and please don't sue me over it...

The location was a Country Fair convenience store in Erie, Pennsylvania....like you couldn't figure that out from the 'dateline' above. But this didn't happen a few weeks or months ago....no, this debilitating incident took place in June of 2004. Worthy of cricket chirps, here...

The net effect of this incident was that Dominica, being sensitive to light, was burned and developed deep emotional, psychological problems....apparently enough to warrant a long-running lawsuit against the store and the clerk on duty that horrific day.

Adults have to use extra caution when around under-age kids....you just can't say and do things you would with someone your own age and size. Apparently this girl was enough of a toot that the unnamed employee called her 'grumpy' and proceeded to do something to make her smile.

Yes, the clerk, having grown weary of the little sour-puss, did the unthinkable: he or she aimed a hand-held product scanner at the girl's face and told her to smile.

Horror of horrors. I pity whoever tries to date, much less marry, this forever-mentally disfigured girl. To wake up in the middle of the night in fearful sweat, all because of a harmless LED light...

Knowing all this trouble would be hanging like a bad odor almost six years later, the clerk SHOULD have whacked grandma over the head with that scanner. Judge Judy would have had a field day with this one...