Scrooge will forever be the iconic figure of curmudgeons who are officially NFW - No Fun Whatsoever. They will always abound, the Scrooges of the world, and so will our pickin' on 'em and calling them what they are. But first, a digression...
My runner-up story was too short to use, and so I present you with the 11th Annual Wacky Warning Label Contest, conducted by Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch. To enter, simply document the most stupid warning label you run across and mail it in. Here are the 2007 winners:
Third Place:
(from a label on a baby stroller with a small storage pouch)
"DO NOT PUT CHILD IN BAG"
Second Place:
(from a label on an iron-on T-shirt transfer)
"DO NOT IRON WHILE WEARING SHIRT"
First Place:
(warning label on small tractor)
"DANGER: AVOID DEATH"
I think I'll heed that sage advice...We now return to today's FF winner...
Dateline: Zhuhai, China
In the hamlet of 1.3 million sardined civilians lives their beloved deputy mayor Chen Yeng. Starting this week, Zhuhai launched a 3-month campaign to boost fire-prevention standards and reduce the risk of...uh...fires.
He did that by starting with the commercial sector, well visible in the public eye: you know, your malls, restaurants, bars, grocery stores, and various other entertainment emporiums...generally, all public venues. Christmas trees are now verboten.
That's right, no Christmas trees allowed. Period. OK, and any other flammable decorations...but the trees were singled out. No matter Christmas is less than a week away. Chunk 'em.
Ironic, too, that this week's announcement came on the same day as President Hu Jintao's remarks in tepid support of religious believers in China, where Christmas decorations and in-your-face symbolism has become rather pronounced. Said symbolism is its own can of worms, of course, viewed as a Western intrusion into Eastern traditions.
According to the Southern Metropolis Daily there, violator's who "fail to rectify the situation will be subject to legal measures like suspension or closure," so was quoted the deputy mayor.
And just where should they stick all those trees? I have an idea.
(cute, unrelated cartoon)
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