Wednesday, September 09, 2009

"Ah, zee cute leetle Poodles!"

It was Sunday afternoon at the Maggie Valley show...the morning began with scattered showers and the crowds never really got cranking like they had been on Saturday. In the mid afternoon an elderly Florida gentlemen (Fred) stopped by, and we began talking woodworking, etc.

He pulled out his wallet and showed me two worn photos of gorgeous wooden kayaks he had built...works of art, they were. He and his wife had a place in FL and one there in NC...he loves the sea, and she loves the mountains.

Somehow the conversation seemed to have no end in sight, and before I knew it he was telling me about the conspiracy theory surrounding the moonwalk. He was a specialized airplane mechanic and as his story went, the plane he had just inspected hours earlier had to make an emergency landing in a 'classified' airfield in Michigan.

His company told him to drive the truck up and inspect the issue, but had to get mountains of clearance to be let in. Authorities told him where the plane was, by one of the behemoth hangars (supposedly big enough to house +40 aircraft each)...and it was late in the day when he got there. He assayed the problem and it looked to be an easy fix...he needed a particular bolt that he did not have with him and so he went to one of the hangar doors to see if anyone was there and could spot him a common aviation bolt, so he said.

All the doors were locked...nobody was around...so he said he took a small screwdriver and knew how to open the door. As he did so, two things struck him. Ghost lights were on and the hangar was filled with dirt and boulders as far as he could see....there were 3 large white suits hanging near the door, and some contraption dimly lit in the distance, but he couldn't really tell what it was.

The other thing were the security officers that were on him like flies on fresh honey as the alarms blared. He had set maybe a foot inside and he said it all happened very quickly...and he didn't really understand what he had seen until he began talking amongst other professionals. He did not speak kindly about the current president, LBJ, and truth be told not many do, mainly because of his manipulative and strong-armed manners.

Anyway, after questioning and believing his innocent story of looking for a bolt, he was released and then he went on about how he and some colleagues tried to follow up with NASA on what was going on, and were naturally stone-walled. The theory says LBJ demanded that the US land on the moon surface in 2 years, and NASA heads said it would take 10...that the rocket simply orbited the earth while the landing and footage was staged, then the capsule splashed in the ocean at the appropriate time. Video footage supposedly shows 'staged' conditions that were unnatural, but I simply crack the lid on that can of worms.

Yep, ya never know what an arts and crafts show holds for ya...

And then the conversation went to his days as a professional clown, and he soon pulled out the long skinny balloons to make poodles...but not just any poodles.


Fifi was made first, but he did something neat at first which was to pinch off a lead piece that ended up in Fifi's belly...he kept asking 'what kind of poodle is this?' and the answer was...a pregnant one!


As if that weren't enough, out came another balloon and Fifi's mate Pierre...

Fred must have been a biology teacher as Pierre was anatomically correct...

Fred went further showing that with a squeeze of his tail, Pierre was in fine working order...

...and then some....!

And then Fred was gone. While the day may have been slow, it was certainly enlightening on many levels! Boring it was not...


5 comments:

Ann said...

Oh my....what a hoot!!! Hilarious!!! That had to make the whole weekend worth while :-) Bet you won't top that for a while....

Bob Child said...

...and you can also add that my blog has gone to the dogs...!

Suzy said...

Education and entertainment all at once!! LOL!!

Fred is very creative (or um, "pro"-creative!) ... what a character! Those are the people in this world, with whom the "fleeting moments of interaction" leave a long-lasting impression! I'm sure he spreads such joy to every soul he encounters!

Suzy :)

Bob Child said...

...and conspiracy theories! :-)

Suzy said...

Well yeah, THAT'S part of the "education" too, LOL!! :)