Friday, October 17, 2008

"Fried Fridays: God only knows..."

Nebraska State Senator Ernie Chambers has been a public servant for 38 years.

Hey, you have to be elected and re-elected to go almost 4 decades in those official roles, and Chambers certainly must have gained a good degree of public trust throughout. God knows he did.

Or did he? God 'knowing', that is...


Chambers filed a lawsuit against God. No, really. His suit claimed that God wasn't properly served thanks to his 'unlisted' address. His claims are that God made terrorist-like threats against him and his Omaha-ians, created and inspired fear, causing "widespread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of Earth's inhabitants."

Now Chambers just wanted to make a (what he thought) sensible point: that "everyone should have access to the courts regardless of whether they are rich or poor." If you're not really following any of this, join the club...

This past Tuesday Douglas County District Court Judge Marlon Polk decreed that, per state statues, a plaintiff must somehow have access to the defendant for a lawsuit to proceed. "Given that this court finds that there can never be service effectuated on the named defendant this action will be dismissed with prejudice," Polk penned. Or more likely typed. Heavens.

Chambers continued the logical rebuttal Wednesday by asserting that the very court admitted the existence of God...and that by such acknowledgment, there is a consequential recognition of God's omniscient nature. Basically, that would mean that since God knows everything, He/She didn't really need to be notified in writing of this lawsuit.

Which reminds me of a joke...

If you're still not following this completely, take a number and stand in line...

Bottom line is the court has ruled and thrown this case out. Chambers has 30 days to talk it over with God and decide how to proceed...or not.

So, back to my first sentence, morphing it into the question that begs to be asked: how did this state senator survive the past 38 years, which now ends thanks to term limits?

The answer: God knows.

And now for the joke that popped into my mind...If you call a psychic, and they answer by saying 'Hello?', are they really psychic?

Have a heavenly day, friends!

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