"Fried Fridays: Udderly unbelievable..."

When you see the above picture, you think of one of two things:

A) it's a cartoon picture of cows, or...
B) it's the SOUTH PARK COWS!!!!!!

I, being of twisted mind, recognize the South Park Cows in a millisecond, since I relate and respond positively to the whole deranged 'mission' of the South Park series on Comedy Central. "Guilty as charged, your Honor," is all I have to say.

I will also admit that I found, for the second week in a row, really slim pickens for "Fried Fridays" awards...John sent me a story about a Renaissance wine label that made it illegal to sell in Alabama because breasts were shown....let's see, we stress for young and old to go to museums for culture, but when said (nude) culture comes to the marketplace we place hypocritical rules on it. "Venus on the Half Shell" is cool in a museum, but verboten on an alcoholic beverage...uh, okay.

Yeah, dig I had to do, and in choosing this week's "Fried Fridays" winner I was not overwhelmed by this story, weird as it is. I love animals. I understand animals. Apparently, across the "Big Pond" things are a little different than they are here in the states...

DATELINE: LONDON, ENGLAND

Let's take bears, for example. A mama bear who has a cub or cubs, and you get too close...you can curl up like a rock all you want and you probably won't live to go on Oprah and tell about it. Kapisch?

Apparently, beloved bovines have an equally darker side to their moon, especially on the far side of the Atlantic. In the past 8 years in Britain, there have been ONLY 18 deaths from cows. (???) That's the official wording. "Only" 18 deaths. Maybe they're taking this "Eat More Chick'n!" thing a little too seriously...

One cultural difference between here and there is that country 'walks' take you across fields that either belong to others or that others' cows graze on...but it's all 'open' and, well, you do your thing and walk. Many walk with 4-leggeds we call dogs...and, just maybe, that's from where this story emanates...

People are being trampled to death by heretofore docile cows. So much so that farmers have now issued warnings about cow tramplings...

(cue the crickets to chirp, for those not scared of being trampled on...)

The list of victims is unusually long, and most revolve around Fido being on a lead, as said 2-legged owners walk them across communal fields. Mad cows focus on the pup and not the 2-legged, but because most 2-leggeds keep Fifi on a leash, they become the one-in-the-same target as el poochy...God forbid there are calves on the hoof...


Then again, some farmers have also become victims as cattle have left their mark, literally and figuratively, on said owners. Trampled. Crushed against a stone wall. Why make a list, as it's all whacked. It's a crazy world out there. A mad world, no less...

Enjoy your chicken sandwich, today!!!!