Monday, May 28, 2007

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!!!"

Earlier I wrote about the legendary giant Georgia hog supposedly shot a few years ago and buried. Because of minimal documentation, National Geographic exhumed the hulking carcass of what was quickly labeled "Hogzilla", with a movie currently in the works. They should have waited a little bit longer...

It took place a solid 3 weeks ago...on May 3rd, young, innocent Jamison Stone, just 11 years old, and "packing (serious) heat" with a .50-caliber pistol, was trouncing through a commercial game preserve with his father and 2 guides...where, after a 3 hour chase and 9 confirmed 'hits' by the lad (always protected by the guides' high-powered rifles), "Hogzilla II" was downed near Delta, Alabama, dwarfing the original Hogzilla by, well, a lot. This swarthy swine tipped the scales at just over 1,050 pounds and was well over 9-feet long...and by modest calculations will yield about 700 pounds of southern-style eatin'. Not real anxious to go traipsin' through the Deep South 'tulips' anytime soon, myself...

And so I went about my business, buying a brace of value-priced squeaky toys at a local grocery store...FYI, my brother and his wife threaten to name their soon-to-be-born twins Floyd and Eunice, so I thusly named this plushy pair and took their pic for prosperity's sake, since I was in the middle of photographing some new flutes anyway...

And then it happened...without warning, under the full hot sun of the day...birds chirping, neighbors planting...there was a sudden rush of confusion and motion, and as I scrambled away to safety I got only a r
ough picture of what legends refer to as...."DOGZILLA!"


There are simply no safe corners in this world, not any more. Floyd quickly joined the legion of homeless squeakerless toys, and I knew him for only mere moments...Eunice was spared, for now...but for how long, I can only seriously doubt...

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And so I hope you, at least, are enjoying your Memorial Day, which many have off as a holiday (hey, the weather must go on...). June comes in this Friday, which ushers in the official Atlantic hurricane season...and heaven knows we sorely need appreciable rain here in the Caroli
nas. Ever so slight chances for thunderstorms crop up Friday through the weekend, but there is little on the immediate horizon to dismantle this overwhelming pattern of high pressure. **SIGH** Just beware of watering holes if you have to resort visiting them...

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For those who have fallen for our freedom over the many years, we thank you...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

The movie makers should base their motion picture on this recently deceased hog. Nope, I won't be going into any woods rumored to have hogs in them after I've seen this pic.
There are also these strange, mysterious creatures known as "Catzilla". I know because my cat occasionally transforms into one.

Bob Child said...

HA! Catzilla and Dogzilla...along with Hogzilla, we have a trilogy of Trouble with a capital T! All I can think is that if these two gargantuans have surfaced, dontcha think there's an even bigger one lurking somewhere???! YIKES!

Anonymous said...

Tiea said...I fell into a hogpen as a child, Momma hog not so happy to see yet another in her pen, she looked like the hogzilla pictured. My Momma wasn't too pleased after I emerged covered in Hog "droppings", she turned into Momzilla realizing I had on my church clothes and hadn't been yet!

Bob Child said...

Sure hope everything came out in the wash, literally and figuratively, Tiea! You could develop a new bath spray line: Eau de Hogge...?!