Things ain't what they used to be.
Only last weekend was it Halloween, the trappings of which I escaped with flying colors this year. In thinking back to my childhood years in Columbus, Georgia, I marveled over the memories of trick-or-treating through the neighborhoods, the huge paper sacks full of sugary booty, the length of time we were out and alone, as in unsupervised...we were monsters on a mission, and we had the times of our lives.
Kissed that stuff goodbye many moons ago, sadly, given the psychos of this world.
Alas, Halloween still brings out the kid in many of us, and in the case of college-age kids the creativity factor escalates...
DATELINE: OXFORD, OHIO
I can remember back in my days at Chapel Hill one Halloween where a girl was dressed all in white as a plumber and her boyfriend was dressed as a urinal. Another woman was dressed as an Acme brick and the guy as a bricklay- uh, er, uh...a mason.
In fact, one of the funnier times was when I donned a gorilla costume and had a hey-day on Franklin Street with friends, 'bout scaring a cook half to death at the greasy spoon "Rathskeller" and getting one of the largest bananas I've ever seen delivered to me on a plate at a local ice cream parlor. I also remember walking on tables in the undergraduate library that evening and going ape on campus transit buses, but I digress...all that with no alcohol and an ultimate 5-pound weight loss by night's end, thanks to my sauna suit.
Gotta hand the ingenuity award to 20 year-old James P. Miller, though...he dressed up as a breathalyzer last weekend, complete with an appropriately placed blowing tube south of his Mason-Dixon line. I'm sure the anticipated jokes grew old quickly, but what does that matter when it comes to a good excuse for a party, eh?
Note to self: wearing a costume home after a party might not be advisable.
Not when you're a human breathalyzer.
Driving the wrong way down a one-way street.
Without headlights on.
With beer in the front seat and in the trunk.
And being underage for alcohol possession and consumption...
While dressed in his alcohol-based garb, ol' James was pulled over and blew his own 0.158 %, twice the legal 0.08%...the upside to this is he got his own memento from the night, a mugshot in his costume...
Don't worry, James. I'm sure it'll all 'blow over' soon enough. Or not. You might want to consider dressing as a priest next year before driving after your Halloween Communion festivities...
Only last weekend was it Halloween, the trappings of which I escaped with flying colors this year. In thinking back to my childhood years in Columbus, Georgia, I marveled over the memories of trick-or-treating through the neighborhoods, the huge paper sacks full of sugary booty, the length of time we were out and alone, as in unsupervised...we were monsters on a mission, and we had the times of our lives.
Kissed that stuff goodbye many moons ago, sadly, given the psychos of this world.
Alas, Halloween still brings out the kid in many of us, and in the case of college-age kids the creativity factor escalates...
DATELINE: OXFORD, OHIO
I can remember back in my days at Chapel Hill one Halloween where a girl was dressed all in white as a plumber and her boyfriend was dressed as a urinal. Another woman was dressed as an Acme brick and the guy as a bricklay- uh, er, uh...a mason.
In fact, one of the funnier times was when I donned a gorilla costume and had a hey-day on Franklin Street with friends, 'bout scaring a cook half to death at the greasy spoon "Rathskeller" and getting one of the largest bananas I've ever seen delivered to me on a plate at a local ice cream parlor. I also remember walking on tables in the undergraduate library that evening and going ape on campus transit buses, but I digress...all that with no alcohol and an ultimate 5-pound weight loss by night's end, thanks to my sauna suit.
Gotta hand the ingenuity award to 20 year-old James P. Miller, though...he dressed up as a breathalyzer last weekend, complete with an appropriately placed blowing tube south of his Mason-Dixon line. I'm sure the anticipated jokes grew old quickly, but what does that matter when it comes to a good excuse for a party, eh?
Note to self: wearing a costume home after a party might not be advisable.
Not when you're a human breathalyzer.
Driving the wrong way down a one-way street.
Without headlights on.
With beer in the front seat and in the trunk.
And being underage for alcohol possession and consumption...
While dressed in his alcohol-based garb, ol' James was pulled over and blew his own 0.158 %, twice the legal 0.08%...the upside to this is he got his own memento from the night, a mugshot in his costume...
Don't worry, James. I'm sure it'll all 'blow over' soon enough. Or not. You might want to consider dressing as a priest next year before driving after your Halloween Communion festivities...
2 comments:
Bob, I remember the scary fun of going from house to house in costume - no one knew who we were, so exciting - and getting tons of candy. Now, however, no one lets their children do that any more. Gated communities have "Trick or Trunk" where people go to a parking lot, open the trunk of their car and kids go from car to car in the daylight. In my home town, on Halloween, they close the main street, and kids and parents go from business to business collecting candy. It has changed from something scary to just begging for candy. So what happens is that when kids are no longer under the thumb of their parents, they go wild, witness the subject of your blog today.
Cheers, Abigail
Amen to that! I had never heard of "Trick or Trunk" until last week, actually. Yep, the good ol' days are toast...now we continue to dumb-down, water-down, and overprotect virtually everything to the point of uselessness. *sigh*
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